Hot Bikini Wallpaper Part 3

If you're a man, you've probably spent considerable time avoiding the subject of diamonds. To her they are coveted sparkling jewels, to you they are bits of carbon. Besides, you could get a big screen TV or a fishing boat instead. But how long will that TV be state of the art? I can tell you the diamond will outlast you, your marriage, your family and all of mankind. And while you can't hand down a fishing boat for generations, a diamond makes a nice family heirloom.

But even more important, you can use them to make amends, to resolve an argument and for other things that I'll have to leave to your imagination which I'm sure is quite vivid in the area I'm referring to.

Below is a list of typical sins. They are probably not sins you have committed word for word. But you've probably had a violation or two that is similar. This is just a guide to how you might overcome some of your shortcomings with minimal effort. And while you may not actually have any shortcomings, I assure you your wife/girlfriend/significant other thinks you do and has made it the topic of conversation with girlfriends at some point in the past year.

So not only will a diamond resolve things with your bride, you'll look like the "awesome guy" to all the women in the neighborhood including the hottie divorcee at the pool who can still make men melt when she wears that string bikini. (Hey, you're just looking and you do still have a pulse.)

Minor Man Goof: You forgot to mow the lawn. Solution: Okay, it's a slip up, it won't cost you any carat output.

Medium-High Man Goof: You forgot to mow the lawn and now local cows are eyeing your lawn as potential pasture grazing territory. While neglecting this chore and other "honey do" list chores, you had male-bonding friends over to watch the races, spilled salsa on the suede couch, got beer on the new wallpaper, burned a hole in the new Tibetan rug with a cigar. Solution: You need to buy diamond earrings from 1.50ctw (carat total weight) to 2ctw. That means each diamond earring needs to be from .75cts to 1.00ct. Do not buy "promotional" diamonds. Adjust the carat weight according to your income level, the level of tolerance your wife has for your misdeeds and how long you're able to survive with no activity in the bedroom. Larger diamonds make larger amends and reap bigger rewards.

Man Goof: You went to a poker game with some buddies and forgot to pick up your teenaged son from basketball practice. It was a cold night and he was standing alone at the practice venue for an hour. His cell phone was not in his gym bag and he had to flag down a stranger in a car on the road (could have been a serial killer) to use her cell phone to call his mother who was out of town who in turn called you at the poker game when someone finally heard the phone and answered. You won thousands of dollars prior to the call that interrupted your fun. Solution: You need to buy a diamond tennis bracelet or diamond pendant for your wife and buy your son the gadget of his choice. You now know you can buy forgiveness and it's a liberating feeling.

Man Dilemma: Your wife, girlfriend, significant complains that you never share your feelings and wants you to "talk" more often and openly about your "feelings". Solution: You can buy diamonds and not have to utter a word about how you "feel". Just hand over the box and watch the jaw drop. If you can muster a sappy look on your face you'll score even more brownie points and this, along with a gift of beautiful diamonds, will translate into "getting in touch with your feelings" from a woman's point of view. It will be 5 years before she ever brings it up again at which point you will repeat the above process but this time with a more substantial gift, guaranteeing the subject will be buried for another 5-10 years. She will be old and with a foot practically in her grave before she ever figures out there was a pattern of non confession of your actual feelings and by then you'll be stricken with dementia and prone to fits of tears anyway.

Man Goof: You forgot the 40th birthday, an important event or an anniversary that celebrates an important year, (10th, 15th, 20th, 25th.....) Solution:There is actually an established historical precedent for this. It will cost you 2.10ct for the center diamond and an additional 1.0cts in side diamonds for a total of 3cts in diamonds.

Major League Man Goof:You had a hot, lurid, steamy affair. Solution: Oh my, this is a big one. You could not have satisfied that male menopause with a hot new sports car? And exactly how did you think this would turn out anyway? You have a home equity loan, right? I suggest you scoot your rear on down to the bank and use it post haste to buy the largest and most impressive diamond jewelry bauble money can buy. You might have to even get a pink diamond. Hey, it worked for Kobe. And you'd probably get out cheaper than you would if you did the divorce thing. Perhaps you read this in time to curtail the possibility of an affair. And if that's the case, I have done my community service.

As you can see, you can utilize to your advantage "her" soft spot for diamonds to meet some goals of your own and insure a fabulous relationship. Who says you can't buy love? It's a win/win situation albeit not one recommended by most marriage counselors. Over ten million men have found this method effective. Now, who would argue with 10 million men?